the weekend crashed and burned

Well , what a shit day saturday turned out to be. Had pretty much a full meltdown at bierspool in front of dibble , mark and then fabulous walked in dressed like an extra from a one direction video. Started a rollers set with the new power meter and it was worse. OMG. I just dont see that my ftp has dropped over 60 watts since last year. Its not like i’m doing nothing. Then the day fell apart like a house of cards. That mio fuse wrist computer (load of shit) app isnt compatible with my phone and there’s no software for a pc, so thats got to go back. A puncture….thats what i said a puncture on the rollers. For the love of god.3 points on my license , everyone is giving me shit and the dog has moved out and is living with the cat next door. Dogs and cats living together wtf??

At least wales won the rugby. That would’ve been too much to bare.I sat in a daze all saturday evening wearing a permanent thousand yard stare. This carried over all day sunday when i simply couldnt face the world and stayed in bed all day. Reading ‘cycle of lies’ about armstrong. is a good book. I concluded that all the top cyclists are either doctors and consultants . Therefore they can get all the drugs they want. They know how to beat the tests.I still remember the national 50 m tt a few years ago. Someone caught ollie for 21 mins over 50 miles . Ollie simply couldnt get his head around it. Who the hell are these people?? Got the finishing sheet.He was doctor blah blah blah. So dont worry Olly the guy was clean off his chunk on fuck knows what.riddled,probably didnt even know where he was. blood so thick with red cells it was like soup. hematcrit level 90.The only reason the pros are better is because they can get even better gear. Which is, in a way , a sad reflection on the state of the NHS in this country today

Slept. Woke up monday morning and ran a half marathon before work. Just a jolly. I am bi polar. I almost enjoyed it. After the mental washing machine i’d had on the weekend the run was like the calm after the tempest.Mind uncluttered just me the birds and the sun coming up and natalie singing ‘torn’ on the mp3. Torn???Try shredded ,ripped apart. I’m not really one for sentiment and Epiphany isnt a word i use ever. But maybe yesterday was a turning point. i fucking hope so i need to declutter my life and get cracking. Italy is only 14 weeks away.

Work then met fabulous in the gym for a core training session. It went quite well . Then in the pool where fabulous took great delight in putting in a set with butterfly in it. Cos he knows i cant do it….at all. Half way down the pool and i’m making inch by inch headway. 3 life guards (three) hover pool side like a pack of circling vultures. Not sure who they will rescue first me drowning through ineptitude or fabulous drowning through being bent over double laughing. Luckily we had to do this 4 times by the 4th time my lack of progress became alarming . Think some lookers might have thought i was disabled and fabulous was my carer.

. It was , on reflection, quite amusing .But not a video i would, personally , enjoy watching. Home , food, walk the dog. bed.

First melt down of 2015. More to come.of that you can be certain